Amen Corner

Intellectual masturbation on writing well:
So, you think you're a writer, eh?

Writin' is fightin'.

Muhammad Ali

The artist is not a reporter, but a Great Teacher. It is not his business to depict the world as it is, but as it ought to be.

H. L. Mencken, Prejudices, from the essay "Criticism of Criticism of Criticism"

Most school writing is bad because student and teacher play at writing instead of taking it seriously. And first, what motive for writing well can the student be made to feel? There is only one valid motive: the desire to be read.

Jacques Barzun, Teacher in America, from the chapter "How to Write and Be Read"

Clutter is the disease of American writing. Our national tendency is to inflate and thereby sound important. The airline pilot who wakes us to announce that he is presently experiencing considerable weather wouldn't dream of saying that there's a storm ahead and it may get bumpy. The sentence is too simple -- there must be something wrong with it. But the secret of good writing is to strip every sentence to its cleanest components. Can such principles be taught? Maybe not. But most of them can be learned.

William Zinsser, On Writing Well

Part, the first: Follow your bliss

Back when I was a young college English prof, I had the pleasure of teaching an introductory journalism class — and a pleasure, it was. When I wasn't chuckling to myself about my female students' sometimes blatant, sometimes coy attempts to sexually tease and/or seduce me, I was often sweating out lesson plans and activities that would impress on them the seriousness of their chosen field and the importance of their dedicating themselves to it fully. I tried to press those lessons home from the Day One.

"I want you to take out a sheet of paper," I'd announce, without fanfare, upon walking into the first day of class. I don't even take roll or introduce myself — it's all done for effect. "This is a test, folks."

A couple of students, predictably, let out a low groan. I smile inwardly and continue: "This test is only two-questions long. Be open and honest with your answers, and write down the first things that come to mind."

I'd pause for a few seconds, looking at each of those sitting on the first row. A couple of students shyly break eye contact with me. One kid matches my gaze and tries to stare me down. I like that in him. I let him think he's "won" the stare-down by breaking eye contact first.

"Question number one: Use three words to describe yourself. They can be adjectives, nouns, whatever."

I pause, and watch them as they write out a response. I watch their body language, their facial expressions, how long it takes before they start writing. I wait a while, making sure most have had a chance to write something.

"Question number two: Write down three words that other people would use to describe you."

I wait a while longer.

"Okay, pens down. Time's up. Now, you," I say, nodding to a young man in the back of the room, "tell me what you wrote for answers one and two." He reads them. I repeat this with a few other students. Then I solve the mystery for them.

"This is a journalism class," I say. "I'm assuming that each of you is an aspiring journalist. Do you consider yourself a reporter or a writer? Don't answer. It's a rhetorical question. We'll return to this question throughout the quarter. But, I want you to think about it from this point on. As for the questions you just answered. I just wanted to see who would give the following answers to the two questions: writer, writing, bookworm, reading…"

I'm sure that they see where I'm going with this.

"My point is that if you aspire to be a professional writer, you must always think of yourself as a writer. It should be in your blood. People that know you should think of you as a writer."

I think they got the point.

The rest of the quarter was centered around the construction and usage of the four basic sentences (simple, compound, complex and compound-complex — consult a grammar book if you're clueless to the definitions). I tried to convince them that if they learned the basics, they'd be able to create some pretty decent writing. I made them write paragraphs day in and day out for the first half of the quarter, before we even began to write full-length pieces.

We did a great deal of reading during the first half, also: I had them bring to class articles from USA Today, to learn to dissect and recognize the "inverted pyramid" style (who, what, when, where and why in the first paragraph; decreasingly less-relevant info in successive paragraphs). I had them read the Wall Street Journal, to learn to dissect and recognize their intro-news story-closing approach. We also read articles from the news magazines. I'm sure I surprised them when I brought them photo copies of excerpts from my favorite comic books, sci-fi novels and theological writings.

In short, we studied the whole gamut of professional writing.
When I got my mitts off of them, I'd like to think that they had a better idea of what it meant to be a writer.

Sometimes, I think that approach to writing is what's missing from today's crop of journalists and scribes, the pros and the wannabees.

Part, the second: Good writing can be taught, or it can be "caught"

Somewhere on this site, Michael Munger and Dave Schulz co-penned a piece in which they argued for more professionalism in web journalism — particularly, they made a call for more pedigreed writers, instead of the part-time "hacks" like Yours Truly. I don't take issue with what they said, since there is validity in what they argued.

I want to take a different tack on that argument: I believe that many writers do not make themselves students of writing. Now, before you send me that flame, hear me out.

Listen first to what I am not saying. I am not saying that the people out there writing should not be writing. Far from it. I think everyone should be out there writing. The web has done what Gutenberg only dreamed: Literacy is now available to everyone. If you have an opinion, you should write it and publish it.

But here is where I have a problem: many people who have been writing on the web for some time now aren't getting any better. Their writing is no better than what it was when they wrote their first piece.

Good writing evolves over time; ditto for good writers. If you are stuck on the same topics and emotional/psychological levels that you were when you started your writing career/avocation, shame on you. No writer worth her salt is stagnant in their craft.

So, to help you get out of your rut and take your writing up a notch to higher levels, I wanted to pass on some principles that I use. These are not the principles, but some principles, my principles. Your mileage may vary.

#1: I read voraciously. Good writers do a lot of good reading. I have a list of favorite writers, whose works I am always reading or seeking out to be read. For example, my bookshelves are full of the writings of Mike Royko, Octavia Butler, Timothy Zahn, John Byrne, Hemingway, Mencken, Fitzgerald, Shcakespeare, Shaw, Woolf. Reading good writing exposes you not only to good ideas, but also to good modes and forms of expression. I l love to examine how someone else has turned a phrase to express an idea or thought that I've often felt or thought. You will NEVER grow as a writer if you don't read.

#2. I try to use sentence variety like an artist wields a paint brush. I try to use short sentences to move the reader along at a fast pace. I try to use long sentences when I want to explain and slow the reader down.

#3. I make it a practice to reread William Zinsser's On Writing Well.
#4. I've developed eclectic reading tastes. When I was in college, there was this journalism major who wanted to be a sports writer. All he read was sports writing. As a result, his writing was full of clichés, listless and often a bore to read. What I've tried to do is develop a wide variety of interests and try to read widely on all of them. A good writer should be able to intelligently discuss virtually any topic, or at least be able to give an intelligent opinion on nearly everything.

#5. I bought a copy of Strunk and White's Elements of Style. Oh, yeah, and I read it, too. This is the Bible of good writing. One of them, anyway.

#6 I always reply to email, even the flames. First of all, it will really make the person hate you if they call you a black sonofabitch -- and you write them back, agreeing with them! There's a kid over at some site called Mac Monkey who loves to cuss me out. I just smile and send him one of those "have a nice day!" notes -- and mean it sincerely. That kind of person will never like you. The purpose of replying to email, though, is to stay in touch with the main reason why you write: to be read. Can't do that without readers. And the readers appreciate it when you write back. I know many "famous" web writers who don’t give me the time of day. I'll be damned if I get that pompous. Well, maybe a little pomposity won't hurt :-)

#7 I fill my library with writer's references, like the Reverse Dictionary. That is a book that has alphabetized definitions, with a series of words for each, the opposite of the regular dictionary. I populate my shelves with other books like the World Almanac, Books on English Grammar, literary criticism, biographries of favoite writers (Mencken, Wright, Ellison, etc.).

#8 I often go and reread my older writings and cringe. The sign of a growing writer is that he or she will go and read older works and immediately see typos, poor word choice, poor grammar, stilted sentence constructions. In other words, the good writer is never happy with his last work. I have written nothing that I'm proud of after the fact. Sure, I often finish writing something and feel proud. But weeks, days, even minutes later, I'm rushing to do a rewrite. I often post an article, and revise and rewrite them after they've been published. Throughout today, for example, if you read this more than once, you will see where I've corrected typos, reworded sentences or even deleted some. The good writer is never satisfied.

#9 She writes about topics that get me excited. When you read a piece of writing, you should be able to tell that the writer was excited about what he wrote.

#10 I try to write about topics and from perspectives that my fellow writers would never consider. From time to time, I write about topics with racial analogies and undertones. But, I'd like to believe that I don't need to even "go there" and still be able to write essays that the other writers wouldn't or couldn't conceive. That's one reason why I believe that everyone should try his hand at web-published writing. You will address issues that I may never imagine.

#11 I keep my eyes and ears open for cool new words, sayings, as well as colorful expressions, bon mots, etc. I often get hate mail about my use of epigraphs and quotes at the beginning of my articles. People usually ask me why I use them. I don’t think they need to be explained. Anyway, most of those come from things I've overheard, said, read, or got from movies, books and other forms of popular culture. I think that developing this habit will sharpen and evolve someone's writing as much as incessant reading.

#12 Write such that you would find yourself interested and excited to read your writing. If I can't make it through reading my own writing, how can I expect others to do it? Hence, I often reread my writing, if for nothing else but to find the flaws in my logic, style and construction. I'm not being self-effacing. This is part of #9.

Follow these guidelines, or principles, and you'll be on your way. It's not easy, as you can see, but always well worth it.

Rodney O. Lain

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